Quotes about Funny

“When you're out of sight for as long as I was, there's a funny feeling of betrayal that comes over people when they see you again.”

“I always stay humble. I don't act funny towards nobody.”

“Never fight an inanimate object.”

“Comedians' first ten minutes usually stay with them the first several years of their career. It's their mission statement. Their disclaimer that lets people know who they are. Or were. It's also a good time to make fun of your name if you have a funny or strange one.”

“I think there's an interesting contradiction of having a young face and an old soul. There's something funny about it, and it also allows you to reinvent being old.”

“What's another word for Thesaurus?”

“Funny enough, if you are looking at people these days who are putting Botox in their face and getting all sorts of plastic surgery, we look at them and go, I can tell you've had Botox. I can tell you've had plastic surgery. You look really strange to me. But no one's saying anything. We're just accepting the fact that they're strange-looking.”

“When you're eight years old nothing is your business.”

“I'm like old wine. They don't bring me out very often - but I'm well preserved.”

“I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.”

“Never floss with a stranger.”

“There's one thing about baldness, it's neat.”

“I was in love with Michael Keaton. He was very funny.”

“I do not think that obsession is funny or that not being able to stop one's intensity is funny.”

“I never smoked. I never drank and I never took drugs. The funny thing is, nothing is more boring, people like this. For me, it's OK. But most of my friends, at least they smoke and drink.”

“I was born in very sorry circumstances. Both of my parents were very sorry.”

“Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.”

“It's been very funny to try to act like an adult. Even getting dressed. Every day, I'm like, 'Should I wear a blazer and walk around with an umbrella? Do I carry a briefcase?' Because I'm trying to be some image of the adults I saw on TV growing up.”

“I don't deserve this award, but I have arthritis and I don't deserve that either.”

“I love mankind; it's people I can't stand.”

“I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back.”