Henri Nouwen

“The journey from teaching about love to allowing myself to be loved proved much longer than I realised.”

“People with handicaps teach me that being is more important than doing, the heart is more important than the mind, and caring together is better than caring alone.”

“Fear is the great enemy of intimacy. Fear makes us run away from each other or cling to each other but does not create true intimacy.”

“The real enemies of our life are the 'oughts' and the 'ifs.' They pull us backward into the unalterable past and forward into the unpredictable future. But real life takes place in the here and now.”

“The Christian leaders of the future have to be theologians, persons who know the heart of God and are trained - through prayer, study, and careful analysis - to manifest the divine event of God's saving work in the midst of the many seemingly random events of their time.”

“Spiritual identity means we are not what we do or what people say about us. And we are not what we have. We are the beloved daughters and sons of God.”

“The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing... not healing, not curing... that is a friend who cares.”

“If fear is the great enemy of intimacy, love is its true friend.”

“The Christian leader of the future is called to be completely irrelevant and to stand in this world with nothing to offer but his or her own vulnerable self. God loves us, not because of what we do or accomplish, but because God has created and redeemed us in love.”

“Waiting is a period of learning. The longer we wait, the more we hear about him for whom we are waiting.”

“Solitude is the place where we can connect with profound bonds that are deeper than the emergency bonds of fear and anger.”

“Did I offer peace today? Did I bring a smile to someone's face? Did I say words of healing? Did I let go of my anger and resentment? Did I forgive? Did I love? These are the real questions. I must trust that the little bit of love that I sow now will bear many fruits, here in this world and the life to come.”

“Our glory is hidden in our pain, if we allow God to bring the gift of himself in our experience of it.”

“The greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity or power, but self-rejection.”

“Most Christian leadership is exercised by people who do not know how to develop healthy, intimate relationships and have opted for power and control instead. Many Christian empire-builders have been people unable to give and receive love.”

“Friendship has always belonged to the core of my spiritual journey.”

“Solitude is very different from a 'time-out' from our busy lives. Solitude is the very ground from which community grows. Whenever we pray alone, study, read, write, or simply spend quiet time away from the places where we interact with each other directly, we are potentially opened for a deeper intimacy with each other.”

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand.”

“Prayer is the most concrete way to make our home in God.”